Someone once said to me, "you can drive yourself towards destruction, or you can drive yourself towards wholeness."
When we come to know Christ and surrender our lives to him, this doesn't instantly take away any 'bad' in our lives. We do not change overnight. We start a journey with Christ. Along the path, we still have many choices and obstacles. Christ does not take away our free will. We can continue on the journey towards holiness and wholeness, or we can decide to wallow in self-pity and never grow spiritually.
I have clinical depression, so I know it is not easy battling thoughts and moods that may bring us down. I, however, have kept this quote in my mind to keep me moving forward. I want to be the best that I can be for Christ. I am striving towards wholeness and have surrendered all my destructive thoughts and moods to God. It has taken several years for me to get to the point where I can honestly say, I am now driving myself towards wholeness and holiness. If you are battling with depression that medicine or counseling doesn't help you with, try surrendering entirely to Jesus. I still need medication and a counselor, but yielding my thoughts to Christ, for him to heal and control has made a huge difference with my moods. I don't see my counselor as often either. I still have days, but that's just it, there's a day here and there and not weeks or months of the consuming darkness. Christ understands that depression and anxiety are disorders and not just moods. He does not expect us to use these disorders as excuses or not to be the best that we can be for him. He doesn't want us using the diseases to sin either. If we know enough that we have an illness or disorder, then we know enough not to transgress or disobey him. He wants us to bring all our burdens to him, even our sicknesses. We can use these illnesses to showcase the power and grace of God. Even Paul talks about his afflictions of the flesh in 2 Corinthians 12. While it's not clear what his ailment was, many believe it was physical.
Which will you choose? Will you choose the path of self-destruction or the way of wholeness in Christ?
And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Corinthians 12:9-10)